May 26, 2018 6:12 p.m.
drink: 3 whiskey sours and one overly sweet vanilla tequila cocktail
topic: breaking the law
I recently had an interesting conversation with a female reader about breaking the law. She opened the DM with: “Ok so like I just read the whole cookie saga. Aren’t you afraid of someone being a “cop” or being open about this stuff and then it coming back around and being used against you for some legal reason? Isn’t prostitution still illegal? No judging at all on my part I’m just so curious about what it’s like to be so open and casual with strangers via social media. I’m 100% a paranoid human and would think everyone was trying to set me up or use me or murder me or worse. How do you get over that?”
I responded: “I guess it’s having good karma, good instinct and twenty six years in the biz. Vice does certain shit in a conversation to trap you; you just have to be smart. Yes, it’s illegal but I live as if it isn’t.” Maybe it’s weird that I have no qualms whatsoever about breaking the law. Laws are written by greedy bureaucrats with agendas; no one tells me how to live. Her second part about being so open with strangers: I’ve always been this way. Ask my mom. It bugged the fuck out of her when I was in my early teens. I was TMI 24/7. I don’t think of it as being overt personal shit I’m giving up as much as human experience we can all relate to on some level.
Yes, prostitution is tragically and stupidly illegal, and yes, I live as if it isn’t. If Vice is smart enough to trap me and I go to jail, so be it. More material for book number five. I’m not temping the universe, I’m simply saying it’s not something I worry about. I did when I started, of course, although not John’s two to four—whom I had known for years at the club—but after that, sure. The times I felt the most uneasy were the few occasions I used online sites, which is why I always meet new, non-club clients for a drink first. I’m not a paranoid person by nature, as I said, I have decent karma and good instincts (and a billion years of experience in judging someone’s intentions). Due to my sharp intuition, I’ve never truly worried about being murdered. Coupled with my laissez faire attitude towards death, I guess I’ve always felt like if that’s my path, so be it. I don’t think it is, however. I have too much to do and too much to give.
This industry takes a certain amount of bravado, that’s for sure. You put yourself out there. You walk the line between guarded and open. You’re naked. You act your ass off. Confidence and intelligence are rewarded (even when masked). If you don’t have those things going in, they might blossom, but if they don’t, you won’t last.