WHY WOMEN IN THE SEX INDUSTRY STIGMATIZE EACH OTHER...

A female follower asked for my take on “why strippers seem to stigmatize escorts”. She’s a dancer herself, and her theory was that it stemmed from Christianity and its moral ethos; that those women “are buying into it without even realizing it”. I agreed that part of the judgment is rooted in moral divisionism: “I get naked on stage, but I’m not fucking anyone for money”. I didn't like when dancers were dirty in clean clubs, and especially when they didn’t charge out-the-ass for whatever they were doing, so I totally get that. I took my extra activities outside the club, and charged more than they’d likely would have spent in the club—the only exception, in twenty-one-years of stripping, was during my last few years at my home club in San Francisco, and I charged accordingly. I wasn’t undercutting what my colleagues were typically making during clean lap dances. But here's the thing: these women want to be respected for their decision, shouldn’t that same respect be carried over for us ladies who choose to be sexually intimate for money? Especially if it has nothing to do with the club.

 

I wonder if some of these strippers (or women in general) who put escorts down are struggling with their own choices. They need to shout the nastiness from the rooftops because they question their own role in the sex industry (or in life). Or perhaps they’re just sick of people assuming that all dancers are whores, which, again, I totally understand. Strippers aren’t hookers—there's a clear distinction. But not if some of them are fucking guys in the VIP. See what I mean? The lines are fuzzier more so now than they used to be. Having said that, there’s an ocean of strippers who run a clean ship. “Clean” meaning; no touching private areas, kissing, or dick out. Back in the mid-nineties it was radical the first time we let guys touch our tits... that was dirty.

 

Every dancer/sex worker has her own boundaries. I’ve been hooking off and on for a very long time, but aside from the handjobs (in total privacy) at that one club near the end, I never let guys touch my pussy or take their dick out: I was a clean dancer for most of my career. It’s possible and its not rare. Unfortunately there are men like The Texan, who think every stripper is just a number away from being a whore. I’ve been telling him he’s wrong for years, but then I’ve seen it happen, over and over again. And for modest amounts of money! Money I would never consider accepting for sex. But times are tough. There’s too many clubs and too many women in the industry: and most of the customers are cheap and spoiled. If all of us (including club owners) would go back to charging properly (for every level of service), men would find a way to pay it and life would be better. Honestly, I think it all boils down to knowing ourselves and being proud of who we are.

 

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